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What is an overgiver? According to Statistics Canada women between the ages of 45-64 who are in the labour force, provide most of the caregiving for ill or ageing family members. These are the statistics of a new generation: the "overgivers". Over givers are mostly women trying to please their children, their spouses, their bosses, and maybe even their ageing parents. This is a serious issue. As our population ages, the stress on women and their families will increase as they continue to care for those who are older. Are you an overgiver? If you feel you are obligated to do more than you can handle, you may be an overgiver. There is an emotional and psychological thread that knits caregivers and care receivers together. This is part of what pushes you into being an overgiver. "Shoulds" versus "Coulds" You may also feel that you "should" look after family members because it's your duty. "Shoulds" are judgmental and starving - they never seem to be satisfied. However "Coulds" are choices you make when you decide how much is too much for you. How do I deal with all the demands? Acknowledging and accepting that this may be a conflict is the first step towards realistic giving versus overgiving. Heidi Helps you learn the tools to deal with your feelings:
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